Regina's Journal

What is more dangerous for women than car accidents, muggings and rapes combined? Domestic Violence!  Does this surprise you? Domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women between the ages of 15 and 44 in the United States, more than car accidents, muggings, and rapes combined. (“Violence Against Women, A Majority Staff Report,” […]

For months my Women’s Warrior Workout DVD was MIA (missing in action). I kept thinking one of my sons had gathered it up after being over, playing games. They both looked and didn’t find it in their stashes… Sadly, I resigned myself to never being able to find it. Of course, it was something from years […]

As I was reading through Rory Miller’s Facing Violence I found many important concepts I would like to share. His book addresses social violence and predator violence. Our focus will be on predator violence since we, as women, are more likely to be targeted by a predator. Absence is the number one way to avoid a predator. It makes since, […]

I was browsing through my new book Facing Violence by Rory Miller. He clarifies the difference in predators. I hope the following information helps you better understand those differences and how serious they are. Resource Predator: The resource predator will use violence to take your money, valuables, car, etc. Typically he only threatens violence, but will use it if deemed […]

Abuse Occurs —> Reconciliation/Makeup —> Calm —> Tension Building Abuse can be any and/or all of the following: Physical, Sexual, Emotional, Psychological During the reconciliation phase the abuser may apologize, promise it won’t happen again; blames the victim claiming you provoked the abuse; gives gifts of repentance. After the explosion and reconciliation, it is common for […]

It can be easy to stand on the sidelines and critique why a woman stays with her abuser. What many don’t understand is the variety of complex reasons she does. Like everything else in life, you have to walk in those shoes. There are economic pressures as abusers often control the finances. Being pregnant, she […]

Pregnancy is the wondrous time in a woman’s life when she is privileged to nurture new life. She glows with excitement as the weeks pass. The anticipation of meeting her little angel face fills her with joy. Each new kick brings joy and trepidation. There are books to read, support groups to join and a […]

Never answer the door to strangers. Keeping the door locked, ask the person to identify him/herself. If you have no scheduled appointment with this person, do not open the door. I can’t emphasize this enough! Just this week my doorbell rang at 7:30pm. It was already dark. I wasn’t expecting anyone. Perhaps it really was an innocent […]

Life’s journey is full of crossroads, minor dips and major valleys along with hill tops and mountain peaks. While participating in my Level 4 Smart Safe certification bootcamp my emotions went through a roller coaster ride of dips, turns, twists and that slow climb to the top as I revisited the reason I do what I do. My heart […]

Are you running from one holiday event to another? Do you need to squeeze in just one more quick stop at the store? Maybe you are going about your everyday routine. Whatever the day may bring, implement these simple safety tips. Awareness and prevention are key to your safety! Analyze possible attack locations from a technical perspective. Think like a “bad guy”. Do not […]

What an awe inspiring experience WIN! Real Life SKills for Kids has been. I always consider it a privilege to learn from Moni Aizik and his Elite Instructors. As Andrew was covering the instructional material I couldn’t help but think, WOW! Moni did it again. When a child is dealing with a bully it is […]

We waste valuable time if we allow our emotions to be in control during an attack. By putting our emotions on “hold” and dealing with the attack at hand in a factual manner, we will turn the element of surprise against the attacker and be the survivor. Emotions can be experienced “post-trauma” when we have […]

Following is a woman’s statement after being grabbed from behind, beaten, sexually assaulted and strangulation attempts. “My view of the world changed. I felt that I had no control; and at times, it seemed that the only way to regain control over my life was to end it.” Thankfully, this woman found the courage to participate […]

If ever in a threatening situation always ask yourself, “What Do I Have?” This leads to: What do I have on my own body: hands, teeth, legs, head, etc. What do I have access to in terms of targets on his body: weak spots: his eyes, throat, groin, etc. What do I have as a […]

I love this quote by Susan B Anthony, “I declare to you that a woman must not depend upon the protection of man, but must be taught to protect herself, and there I take my stand.”. In women’s self defense, we use knowledge to our advantage and capitalize on his weaknesses. His size or muscle […]

89% of women who were raped or experienced an attempted rape knew their attacker. 64% of all sexual assaults occurred in the target’s or attacker’s home. Since most people interact with their acquaintances in common facilities; where they live, work, socialize, study, shop, etc., it is no surprise these attacks occur in those locations. While […]

Typically a potential attacker will put his target through a testing period. He will be assessing the circumstances and his chance of completing his plans. This will include conversation and/or an attempt to dominate the target. It is during this period that women should key in on their intuition and the attackers behavior. The situation […]

Realize attackers are typically acquaintances. When we meet or actually know someone, we have an impression of them. It will range from nice person, someone I can learn from, watch out, creep, and a sense of discomfort. Trust your instincts! A negative impression is a warning from your intuition. Trust it! That person may attempt to disrespect […]

1. Victim’s thrown into car trunks should kick out the tail lights, stick an arm out and start waving like crazy, hopefully waving a red or white cloth. This can save lives. 2. When in a parking lot/garage, be aware. Look around you, under your car, inside your car at the passenger side and back […]

1. Your elbow is the strongest point on your body. If you are close enough, use it! 2. If a robber demands your purse, DO NOT HAND IT TO HIM. Throw it away from you. RUN LIKE CRAZY IN THE OTHER DIRECTION! 3. Women have a tendency to get into their cars after shopping, working, […]

There is no way to tell for sure if someone is experiencing domestic violence. Those who are battered, and those who abuse, come in all genders, shapes, sizes, colors, economic classes, sexual orientations and personality types. Victims are not always passive with low self-esteem, and batterers are not always violent or hateful to their partner […]

Confrontational personality, has a reputation of being hostile and aggressive. She has a chip on her shoulder and is not very sociable. She is an unlikely candidate for any type of flirting, harrassment or sexual assault. Assertive personality, has high self-esteem, confidence, and experience. She is at home in social settings and exhibits a “Don’t […]

If you don’t have the physical skills you used to, it likely means you’re even more of a target for the epidemic of random street violence escalating across the globe today. It’s the reason why this information is even more critical to you. Here’s a snippet taken from TFT Master Instructor Chris Ranck-Buhr’s recent article, […]

Domestic violence is the willful intimidation, physical assault, battery, sexual assault, and/or other abusive behavior perpetrated by an intimate partner against another. It is an epidemic affecting individuals in every community, regardless of age, economic status, race, religion, nationality or educational background. Violence against women is often accompanied by emotionally abusive and controlling behavior, and […]

Safety Tips for Home • Alert your friends, neighbors, and apartment building personnel about your situation. Give them as much information as you can about the stalker, including a photograph of him/her, and a description of any vehicles s/he may drive. Ask them to notify you or call the police if they see the stalker […]

Safety at work or school: • Alert all co-workers, schoolmates and on-site security staff about your situation. Give them as much information as you can about the stalker, including a photograph of him/her, and a description of any vehicles s/he may drive. Ask them to notify you or call the police if they see him/her. […]

The next several blogs will have suggestions on how to keep yourself safe if you are being stalked or harassed. Stalkers can be someone who you are/were in a relationship with, a coworker, acquaintance or even a stranger. These are general suggestions which may not be appropriate in every situation – please pick and choose […]

Any skill set will improve with regular practice; typing, shooting, cooking, driving, and observation skills. As you go from one activity to another in your day, observe the people around you. Visualize what you would do if: that man on the corner grabbed your hair as you walked by; you noticed a van following you; your friend’s […]

This post is in light of February being Teen Dating Violence Awareness month. While there are many warning signs of abuse, here are ten of the most common abusive behaviors: •Checking your cell phone or email without permission •Constantly putting you down •Acting extremely jealous or insecure •Having an explosive temper •Demanding to know where […]

As seen on TV’s 48 Hours Live to Tell, Adam Lane invaded a home at 4 in the morning through an unlocked door. Here’s the link to the story: http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2011/02/26/48hours/main20036509.shtml?tag=exclsv Use this opportunity to help your friends and family remember the inportance of locking their doors.